Date: Tue, 28 Mar 1995 17:53:09 EST Reply-To: The NOMAD2 Discussion List Sender: The NOMAD2 Discussion List From: "William J. Ryan" Subject: How do you shoot yourself in the foot? The following excerpts were compiled from "The Well," a counterculturish hacker's BBS in California: --------------------------------------------------------------------------- The proliferation of modern programming languages (all of which seem to have stolen countless features from one another) sometimes makes it difficult to remember what language you're currently using. This guide is offered as a public service to help programmers who find themselves in such dilemmas. "How Do you Shoot Yourself in the Foot?" C : You shoot yourself in the foot. C++ : You accidentally create a dozen instances of yourself and shoot them all in the foot. Providing emergency medical assistance is impossible since you can't tell which are bitwise copies and which are just pointing at others and saying, "That's me, over there." Fortran: You shoot yourself in each toe, iteratively, until you run out of toes, then you read in the next foot and repeat. If you run out of bullets, you continue anyway because you have not exception-handling ability. APL: You shoot yourself in the foot, then spend all day figuring out how to do it in fewer characters. Modula-2: After realizing that you can't actually accomplish anything in this language, you shoot yourself in the head. Pascal: The compiler won't let you shoot yourself in the foot. XBase: Shooting yourself is no problem. If you want to shoot yourself in the foot, you'll have to use Clipper. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- So I raise the questions: - Any additions to the list? - How do you shoot yourself in the foot with Nomad? Bill Ryan, Information Works, Inc. back to index